Tue night... 7 mins more to go before Wed!

Tons of information                                                                          Bombarding the disturbing mind

Flood of emotions                                                                              Overflowing the tranquil heart

It's only a start for the end of the old life

Struggle                                                                                              beyond the tradition

Striking for the best to be excelled       

Waiting for the unknown to go with

A cage bars the flaming youth

A caged heart to free a caged reality

What for? What way? What's left?

Sat Ooops should be Sun ...nop.. mon already cos it's 12:02 am.

A week to go before the school starts again...  new school...new students...new colleagues... new duties.... lots of duties......... really scared that i could not manage them (work and study in the meantime plus many other things....

3 years of teaching. Is that expereinced to be called? But the school thinks I am and so there are lots of things to do.... maybe it's their excuse to give more jobs to do....nono... be positive......

 "SAY NO when you can't manage so many things at the same time"... that's the Father told us in the New teachers induction workshop....

God will know that and take care of me....

but I'd better say less and keep working in the new environment.. bear in mind... before i know the dynamics and relationship there... (i gotta write it down so that i can remember it.)

Tue Panel meeting.... really have to bear in mind and listen.........

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There's been mixed feeling stirring me these days... I know why...

Sometimes it's really hard to manage such intense and overflowing feeling inside.. when you can't really do anything, say anything or write anything.......when you're missing a person/a thing so much. (Oh! I did write, but unsent, untext, un..., un...)

That's not pleasant at all... Gotta get rid of it.......but can't..

The next time this bomb  explode... will be the peace comes... along with destruction...

really fed up with this kind of playing.... hide and seek, guess and hope....and waiting...do you know i'm waiting?Better just tell me not to wait or simply reject me... just make it neat and tidy/ clean and clear!

would like to have a vacumn clearner to clear all those feelings and memories in my mind......

Read till late night.

The feeling was so good.

Haven't immersed myself so completely in the sea of a story ... and feel so engaged in the fictional world since after DaVinci Code...

That's fantastic!

After all I'm a bookworm!

Two days ago... got the chance to chat with a friend on msm..

He is really a lovely guy. Young as his age, he knows what he wants to achieve and just works for it...

We met each other all because we share a similar interest --- Babies! The first thing we start our endless talk is baby... We all love kids so much!!!!.. then people..then our stories... then personal stuff.. then life....

I've never thought that we can be so good friends (soul mate)... We share almost everything... our past... our vision..dreams .. He is so tender and a good listener for me... but sometimes he can be realistic enough to pull me back from dreams....

Perhaps we belong to the similar kind of people--- sensitive.... caring....But sometimes being sensitive could cause lots of trouble and make us even more complicated and difficult.. that's our conclusion.

He's a drama himself...very damatic one...full of complexity young as his age...even younger than me.. but I see the future and the success in his eyes and vigor.

I feel really comfortable for and sense of trust from him... I guess it's only because he is somehow different from usual guys... that can share and understand the female sides of thinking....

It's never been esay for me to find a person to talk about stuff like life..... I've learnt from many lessons since I was young. Don't talk about life in  front of most of your friends.. or they may think that you're a freak or pretend to be a very different person ... the conclusion is that you're finding your own problem..... That's my friends (friends of similar ages of me....  friends at a basic human level, friends of fading from my life)...

Deep in my heart... "What 's wrong of talking about or thinking about life... as it is so close to us.?"

As I grow up, I start to understand more about them... they don't wanna talk.. cos they are escaping.

They don't want to face it cos it's too scary, scared my the truthness about what life is.... and hence just to live in their world of virtual simplicity...

That's what they claim -- simple is the best!!!! -- don't think too much... just enjoy life... what they mean by enjoying life---

"Life is short!"

"I'm too busy! Better do something more meaningful!".... e.g: shopping.... gossiping..... dating with endless partners.........taking drugs... sleeping with others

Working without asking why....Doing without knowing why... That's life!

Not to talk about it is a way to cover up the vulnerability, to delay the pain, to paralyse the senses...

Am I criticizing them? Non!

That' s their choice of life.... at the end of the day... how much satisfaction do they have for life? How much do they understand about themselves in life? They know it well!

I'm not a phillosopher.......  Whatever they think about... that's me.. and that's life!

I prefer not to confront it but understand it,......... and live up the spirit!

Really thank you, Mr. R! you're been my very good friend! xoxoxxoxo for u.

A post PPD-day!

Never thought that there would be another person leaving a message in my blog! Thanks Phoebe for your message. Don't know if you got the chance to read my assignement?

I've been wishing more people could leave messages in my blog!!! Now my wish comes true!!!

Yes I totally agree with you that i should read my book first!

I quickly start to read "the Historian" today. The plot is so engaging that I could not put it aside. It was a story about a chase of Dracular for generations among a few main characters. They were all involved in the adventure to find Dracular, the evilish monster ever in this world. Layers of mystery and unanswered questions are unfolded in the journey. It's almost 1000 pages but it's not boring at all. I'm really jeaulous of the main main character who was the historian to have this breath-taking and exciting adventure. The sense of having a company in the adventure whom you find you start to like is romantic enough to make this story appeal to different levels. I wish I could have chance to venture though there could be horrible encounters and risk. But that's the excitement.

What if I one day meet a guy who was from the character of a story book looking for his lost past in reality............Well that would be an interesting story and i could be one of the main characters.

Wa............hahahaa...........

DONE!!!! IT"S OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

I finally finished my assigment of PPD. But now it's midnight!!!

If I didn't have to attend the so-called "Catholic school welcome day for new teachers", I would watch my favourite films again tonight for celebration! But I have to get up at 7:30 tmr. No time to really rest.

PS: There are mountains of readings to read.... But i gotta finish my book "the Historian" which I have been putting aside since I was back from Sanya. Really an exciting story! What if Vampire is still alive, how would you feel?????